Joan's Story

 "This is not easy - to tell my story - but over the years I have discovered that my story has a common thread with other women who are being abused and have gone to a shelter for help.

When I look back at the life I was living four years ago it seems unreal. I was living with an abusive alcoholic partner and attempting to make everything seem completely normal. On the outside, there was a façade of the typical suburban family with two lovely children complete with a beautiful home and a white picket fence. On the inside, I had the impossible task of trying to patch up the growing number of cracks that were threatening to bring it all down. I withdrew from my friends and family as I ran out of believable excuses for my husband's behaviour. I withdrew from all social events as I could neither bring my husband nor leave my children with him.

My husband began to sense that I was withdrawing from him and his moods became erratic. When he threatened my life, I knew that it was time to leave. A police officer helped the boys and I calmly leave our house of broken dreams.

He took us to Interim Place. Although I knew that the shelter would be the best place for my boys and me, I had no idea what to expect. My fears were soon allayed when we were welcomed with open arms and there was a homey atmosphere.

At first, I needed to simply sort out my emotions and deal with my husband's constant manipulations. I was in tears, I was angry and I was overwhelmed. The counselors were able to both guide me through my emotional chaos and help me to access all the services at the shelter.

I gained confidence in myself as I was given the information on housing, employment and legal matters that I needed to move ahead and escape my old life of abuse. In particular, the help I received with my children as they dealt with the impact of witnessing the abuse help me to realize that I had made the right decision in leaving.

The services at Interim Place are well planned and welcoming. My time at the shelter was time well spent and I have moved on. Now I have sole custody of my children. We live in a townhouse on our own and my children once again feel secure and safe.

During the past year I have had an opportunity to give back to Interim Place, I volunteer on a regular basis and try and help other women by supporting and encouraging them as they make the same journey as I did. I speak on their behalf to community groups and schools, bringing the message that abuse is wrong and need not be tolerated. That there is help out there and Interim Place does make a difference in women and children's lives.

My children and I no longer live a façade: we embrace each fresh day safe and with the knowledge that life can be good.

Joan.